As you know, some time ago I posted this survey on marriage. The questions were simple, relating mostly to the factors that coincided with the respondents perceived marital satisfaction. After receiving over 500 responses, predominantly from evangelical Christian women, I have to admit that I was surprised by the results.
For instance, we found that sexual and emotional affairs do not necessarily negatively impact marital satisfaction. In fact, marriages in which affairs have been confessed and grace has been extended seem to thrive, and the individuals in these marriages indicate a high level of marital satisfaction. It was a hopeful, astounding revelation and it proved what I conceptually knew–confession and grace pave the way for liberation.
But there were other surprising findings. For instance, couples indicating marital satisfaction of 4 or 5 (on a 5 point scale) did not note struggles with sexual intimacy. However, those indicating marital satisfaction of 3 or below overwhelmingly noted that sex posed a significant marital struggle.
It is nearly impossible to prove cause and effect, but when the majority of ”average” marriages struggle in the realm of sexuality, we think it’s time to examine the issue more carefully. Perhaps the sexual struggle is a simple issue–he’s overworked, tired, lacking in energy. Or perhaps the story is deeper–she struggles with over-sexualized image issues, past guilt, unconfessed shame and regret. Either way, it’s time to get to the root of these issues, to discover the core truths that create sexual barriers in marriage.
A few of us have formulated a completely anonymous survey dealing with marriage and sexuality. And here’s the deal–we’ve run this survey for a couple of days and already have a statistically significant sample size… of women.
Gents, can you help us out by taking this survey? (Feel free to pass it on to you other gent friends).
And ladies, feel free to take it too.
Thank you so much. As you know, I’m in the middle of a bit of a blog break. I’ll share the results when I come back in a couple of weeks.